Something Neat XIV: Patrick Malahide, Samuel L. Jackson and Dawn French

Here are a couple of little YouTube clips. They are both short but sweet and illustrate Mr. Malahide’s comic abilities.


One angry goverment minister.

One angry government minister.

First, a little clip that someone posted on YouTube, from Extras S01E05: Samuel L. Jackson (2005), featuring, well, Samuel L. Jackson.  Patrick Malahide plays a British government minister and they perform a pitch-perfect scene lampooning over-the-top Hollywood action blockbusters with the raging bureaucrat and the cowboy cop.  Actually, if it were a film, I bet it would be a really entertaining one. 🙂

The dialogue is brilliantly ridiculous:


What exactly am I supposed to tell the Prime Minister?

Minister:  For God’s sake!  You bloody yanks are all the same.  You walk around like you’re John Wayne and leave us to clean up your mess. I’ve got three embassies baying for blood, got two dead diplomats, and a partridge in a bloody pear tree.  Whitehall is running around like a bunch of headless chickens.  What exactly am I supposed to tell the Prime Minister?

Jackson: (inhales on a cigar) Tell him Uncle Sam’s in town.

Video Clip

If Looks Could Kill

Inspector Nugget, of the Yard

Inspector Nugget, of the Yard

If Looks Could Kill (2000) is a training video, produced by Video Arts, designed to help staff treat customers with courtesy and professionalism.  It features Patrick Malahide as Inspector Nugget of the Yard and Dawn French as Mrs. Hapless.

From the Video Arts website:

How people behave when dealing with customers or colleagues can determine the success or failure of each interaction.

In this spoof detective case, a customer is driven to distruction by the careless behaviour of staff at the doctor’s, at the shoe shop, in the post office and at the station. In a series of engaging, amusing and realistic scenarios, the detective must piece together the customer’s movements to see how the behaviour of several suspects led to the demise.

I haven’t seen the full version, but the trailer on its own is very funny.  Dawn French seems like the customer from Hell, but it isn’t entirely her fault as Inspector Nugget smoothy educates his suspects on ways they could have improved their own behavior to prevent this “tragedy”.

I am......police!

I am……police!

There is an especially cute moment when David Bamber (the guy who played Charles Chisholm in The Paradise) suggests they call the police.  Inspector Nugget, with clenched jaw:  “I am……police!”

Very brief video below.



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